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How easy is it to make a choice?

Updated: Dec 2, 2021

It was a wintery, cold day. Well Brisbane, Queensland, Australia wintery, cold day when it finally hit me: I am in life, where I am because of the choices I made. WOW!

When you think about it, I stated the obvious, but the moment I realised that to be true, my whole life shifted. You may know certain things, you may be shaking your head agreeing, but until you see the results in front of you, you will not see that responsibility lies in a simple choice.

To make a choice or not to make a choice?

Barry Schwartz in his book The Paradox of Choice tells us just this: that making a choice is a paradox. On one hand, we live in times when everything is available, all the time and there are endless possibilities to choose from. We live in a world of abundance which even not long time ago, was unimaginable.

You should be happy, overjoyed, and satisfied.

On the other side of this spectrum is the obsession with making the right choice. We created so many ways to choose from that we no longer know how to do it. Now, instead of feeling happy and fulfilled, you feel anxious, dissatisfied, and regretful.

Because there are so many decisions to make, so many shiny objects to choose from, you no longer can clearly see what it was all about.

I can see how you can get stuck in decision-making paralysis which causes you some heartache and blaming yourself for the choice you didn’t make. Have you ever been in a situation when you couldn’t make a choice, so you didn’t choose anything?

Well, my friend, not making a choice is a choice too.

That’s the paradox.

It’s not you, it’s me.

Do you know the saying: it’s not you, it’s me? I love this saying because when it comes to making choices, it’s right on a mark. But your life is not about the choices you made; it is about the responsibility you take for the choices you made.

I want to tell you, that things started shifting for me, the moment I started taking responsibility for my choices. For a really long time, I was stuck in life, unhappy, feeling depressed, and hating the place where I was. And it didn’t matter how many stress management techniques I implemented, how many meditation classes I took, or how many self-care books I read until I accepted that I was in life where I was, because of the choices I made and the actions I took.

Aren’t you tired of feeling stuck? Are you playing a victim of your life? Or are you a hero?

Shift your life and take responsibility for your choices.

Are you working in a job you hate? Are you complaining about the company, the economy, lack of promotion, missed opportunities? Or are you taking responsibility that it is your choice, after all, to stay there?

Are you eating unhealthy foods, excessively drinking, and not exercising? Are you complaining how you are tired all the time and how you don’t have the time to eat healthy? As Alan Pease says in his best-selling book don’t blame others for being overweight and unhealthy, because it was your hand putting food in your mouth.

It’s still me, not you.

I know there will be skeptics out there ready to argue that not everything is their responsibility. And there are possibly a few exceptions in life but think this way: the moment you admit that it is your responsibility that you are in the situation you are, that you eat unhealthily, you are stressed, you are overweight, that you don’t exercise, you are stuck in your life, you change your perspective.

Now, you have the tool you can use to take control of your life.

What a powerful realisation.

Once I realised, I was stuck in life because it was me making the choice of staying in a place I hated, not looking after my body, drinking excessive amounts of alcohol, putting garbage into my mind, I took responsibility.

Was it easy to accept the responsibility? Hell, no! I didn’t want to admit I was responsible for where I was, because it wasn’t where I wanted to be. But you know what? It gave me the power I needed to shift my life and move towards the life I knew I deserved. You can do that too.


Choice is freedom, and I think we give out the keys to our freedom too often. We let outside circumstances to create our lives, where it should be us, creating our lives.

The abundance of choices to pick from can be overpowering, but the more often you take responsibility for the choices you make, the more often you start making better choices.

Let’s this be the power which changes the trajectory of your life, so you can live a healthy and fulfilling life.

Ask yourself: are you taking responsibility for your choices in life?

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Having troubles taking responsibility for your choices? Go on: to find out more about Anna Doktor Wellness Coaching and how I can help you to create the life you always wanted. Alternatively, send me an email at or call to have a chat to see how we can work together tel: 0498016440.

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